Thursday, 24 February 2011

Jasper...he's a cat

Hello blog readers...

".. emm Ian"
"what happened to your Christmas blog part 2?"
"don't know what you are talking about..."

... sorry about that on with the blog!!

So I put out into the twitter universe this morning that I needed to blog as I hadn't in ages and I asked some people for some help in coming up with a subject to blog
about. Up steps my friend Hayley (the only person who responded to my needs) and she said: "@pink_syd do a blog about cats!" so here it goes.

We got Jasper when he was about 6months old (from what I remember) ... he was I cat and he was small. It was 14 years ago and that would make me 11 years of ages (everyone come on "awww") and it was June or there about and at this point his name was "cat". This was at no point a inside joke to a family of Red Dwarf fans but just because within our home we had a bowl full of names and one was yet to be picked at random. Everyone in the house (dad, mum, brother, sister and myself) got to pick two names they where all very normal (other than Batman which was one of mine) and my dad picked... HAPPY DAYS! Batman had come out, I was over the moon! We had a cat and his name was frickin BATMAN! .. this lasted about 45 seconds when the family over turned the "at random" pick and went into the bowl for a second time (this was not fair, but I was 11 and had little say in family matters) and out came Jasper and this became his name. I should bring to your attention that Jasper was my other name I put in, but I had been robbed of Batman the cat and was being moody, I shallow victory to say the least.

... I would like to point out that while I write this I have slowly started to feel like I am writing a
really shit autobiography ... i'm (at least of time writing this) not a famous person and have just written a fair bit about a cat who should have been called Batman. So if I ever have a need to write one can someone remind me about this and I will put it in, if not just to eat a little amount of wordage. thanks.

Anyway we should fast forward a few years but I can in less than 10 words say what the next years where like "he was mad, ran about lots, lots of biting". While all this was happening he slowly began to age... he ran about less and slept more not to say that he still isn't mental, because simply he is... and the biting well that happens more mostly to me the little shit LOVES biting me. When he is hungry, when I dont stroke him, when I'm sleeping and he want's company .. all in all he's a little shit, a cute little shit but still one none the less.

Jasper has become a old man now, a grumpy one at that but it still classed by my mum as my "little brother" ... (ITS A CAT) he's not my little brother he is a cat if anything he is MY cat, he was bought for me.. so when I get annoyed at the little bugger I'm fine to do this. why couldn't
we have a cute dog... I like dogs I am like a dog so would enjoy one a lot more, maybe not the picking up of poo but still...

... while typing this I've just looked across from him and noticed he is upside down on the couch next to me, he's snoring and breathing very loudly which is making him sound like "Weezy" from Toy Story 2 .. in fact let me take a "live" photo ... there thats him, being cute. After all this talking about him, I still love the little bugger to bits and he's just like everyone else in my family.. a massive pain in the arse, but never the less family and he is awesome.

I even have a little treat, a video I made a while ago about him, in it you'll see him be lazy, pointless and rather cute.. so go on click it, go watch.

Bye guys. until next time!

Ian x


  1. May I keep Jasper, please? He's adorable.
    ALSO: Isn't Edd's cat called Jasper as well? Does this call for a cat battle? Probably not, it's probably quite a cruel idea. A cat battle Ian? What a HORRIBLE idea.

    (I apologise for this comment; I've had a touch too much sugar and caffeine.)

  2. Yes they are both called Jasper... I didn't know Edd at this point... no cat fighting. and no you can't have him. he is MINE! :D